March 14, 1997
The predicted snow started about 10:00 this morning, changed to sleet, changed back to snow - huge flakes- then back to sleet. It feels like little blocks of ice falling on you. Not exactly pleasant. Kevin is picking up the kids himself today. I should stay in off the roads to avoid any more trips to the body shop for the Auntmobile.
I have no idea how to pack even though I travel a lot. I keep thinking I should be able to fit everything in one small suitcase and I never can. A week's worth of underwear, socks, and t-shirts alone fill up a carry on bag. Where am I supposed to pack my sleeping bag, Thermarest, hiking boots? I have a larger suitcase but it has never smelled right since it got soaked in a flood in Quito in 1995. I keep meaning to get rid of it and buy a new one, but I never do. I hate packing.
I have the usual anxiety about being away from home. What disaster will befall my family while I'm gone? Will Wilbur eat? Will Wilbur shred my house in revenge? Will the next door neighbors burn down the entire condo complex? Well, this is the usual anxiety for me. I keep asking my therapist if it's normal to have this much trouble going away from home and she asks "what's normal?" I have no idea what other people feel. I constantly compare my insides to other people's outsides. That's natural for me because I have next to no ability to control my facial expressions so I unconsciously assume every one else looks the way they feel too. I know that's not true but I keep getting caught in that trap.
I do wish I knew what I am forgetting to pack.
I finally reached my doctor's office yesterday to ask for new prescriptions so I'll have enough of everything for the whole week. They said they'd call it in to the pharmacy. I went over to CVS this afternoon and of course they'd never called. I called the doctor's office immediately (from my car phone in the parking lot of CVS) and the entire staff was at lunch from 11:00 to 1:00. I called back again around 1:30 and on the 10th try got through and asked if they could please do it today because I'm leaving for California in the morning. They assured me they would. We'll see.
I picked up the long-awaited prescriptions at CVS at 6:45. I was relieved it was all there. The only hitch is he only gave me enough Zoloft for 2 weeks - no refills. That'll cover my vacation just fine. I'll have to go through the same hassle when I get back. At least the other scrips are ok. Why is it that doctors and pharmacists treat people who take psychiatric drugs like untrustworthy criminals? That's a rhetorical question, no need to answer. So I'm all set for the trip except that I still have no idea what to pack. At least anything I might have forgotten is available in California - unlike Russia. There's something to be said for domestic travel over international travel.