Journal of a Sabbatical

June 17, 1999

the myth of washable paint and other vicissitudes

Today's Starting Pitcher: Pat Rapp

Reading: none

My first mistake was opening the window. Well, maybe my first mistake was buying this condo 21 years ago, but we're just counting today's mistakes. The window slid off its track and fell out into my hands. The rectangular metal thing with the spring inside that takes the place of the sash cord in these modern windows went sproingggggg and popped onto the floor.

My first thought was "now I can give that window a good thorough cleaning for a change". Not usually what leaps to mind when repairs are urgently needed before the supposed drenching rains, but I seem to have a serious cleaning jones lately. So I got out the Windex and gave both sides of the window a thorough cleaning.

Then I decided to clean the frame. Mistake number 2. I sprayed the frame with Fantastik cleaner. I scrubbed. Some of the paint came off. Some of the dirt stayed on. Mist or foam or something from the Fantastik seeped in between the panes of the double paned window where I can't get at it. So now the frame looks mottled and the glass is fogged.

While I was at it, I wiped the windowsill with a damp cloth to clean off the dirt. Another mistake. The allegedly washable paint came right off in spots. Now the whole myth I'd been told when I had this place painted by the book-phobic homophobic painter was that the paint wiped clean with a damp cloth so you could keep it pristine looking all the time. That and that it would wash off my furniture and counter tops and books and possessions on which he splattered it. I remember spending two days scraping it off my countertops and possessions when he left. It never came off the furniture. Yet, every time I have had to wipe something off a painted surface with a damp cloth as directed, the paint comes off. Go figure.

Anyway, I was finally ready to put the window back in.

It wouldn't fit.

I fought with it, cursed it, leafed through the yellow pages looking for emergency handymen and finally just sat down and looked at it. After a good sit, I took the springs out on both sides and slide the window into the frame. That way at least it's closed if the forecasted rain appears tonight. I can't open it and leave it open unless I wedge it with a stick, but it's cool enough out there now that I don't want it open.

Oh yeah, I forgot to mention it gouged the windowsill when I dropped it too. So that'll have to be sanded and repainted.

And my therapist wonders why I doubt my competency at adult daily living skills...